Transcripts - Monkey Fist Strikes
Global Justice Alliance

Transcripts - Monkey Fist Strikes


Episode Monkey Fist Strikes
Language English
Type Closed Captioning
Date Written October 22, 2007
Author WallaceB, Campy
Author Comments Not Available
Wordcount 4669


(Kim is climbing the sheer face of a mountain thousands of feet up. Her Kimmuincator is strapped to her wrist and beeping with a homing signal. Ron is climbing up right behind her.)
Kim: Signal strong ... and annoying.
Ron: Don't look down, Rufus.
Rufus: Heh? Ahh! Ahh!
Ron: You looked down! You looked down!
Kim: Getting closer. Where are you hiding?
(Kim climbs over a ledge and finds her target, a small eaglet.)
Kim: Well, there you are.
(Ron is using a pulley to pull himself up, but the rope trips him up and he turns upside down and loses his pants up to his feet.)
Rufus: Huh?
Ron: Okay, this is a setback.
Kim: We'll get that wing fixed up. You're safe now.
(Kim starts to rapel down the sheer cliff face, but the piton holding her rope breaks loose and she free falls.)

(Intro Credits)

(Kim pulls the cord on her parachute and safely floats to the ground. A National Park ranger drives up.)
Kim: Hi!
Eaglet: (Chirps)
Ranger: You saved a life, Kim Possible.
Kim: It's what I do. You know, the help thing.
(Ron has managed to lower himself down to the ground, still upside down and his pants up around his feet.)
Ron: I'm the sidekick.
(The Kimmunicator beeps)
Kim: What up, Wa-- Dad?!
Mr. Dr. Possible: Kimmy, do you know what night it is?
Kim: Um ... it's still day here
Mr. Dr. Possible: Well, it's family game night in Middleton, and we're missing a gamer.
Kim: My bad. It was an emergency.
Mr. Dr. Possible: Your cousin Larry will be so disappointed.
Kim: I saved a baby eagle.
Ranger: You should be very proud of your daughter here, sir.
Mr. Dr. Possible: Oh, she's a pip all right. Well, I'll break the bad news to Larry.
Kim: Tell him I feel terrible, Dad.
Mr. Dr. Possible: I know you do, hon. Bye now.
Kim: Yes! Close one cuz! But not this time.
Ranger: Cousin a loser?
Kim: He's totally creepy.
Ron: Whoa!
(Ron lands roughly in the bed of the Ranger's pickup truck)
Ron: Cousin Larry again?
Rufus: Whoa! Ptoooie! Larry.
Ron: You've been complaining about him since, forever. What's so bad about Cousin Larry?
Kim: Do you have all night?
(Kim and Ron start waling away to go back home.)
Kim: It all stated when we were 3. Aunt June brought Cousin Larry over for a play date........
(Kim and Ron are now flying home on a plane.)
Kim: Flash forward to family game night.......... (Kim is laying on her bed. Ron is lying down in hsi bed. They are talking onthe phone together. )
Kim: Once a month Larry comes over, and I am stuck in freakville!...... (Kim and Ron are now in school the next day.)
Kim: And now, Larry drones on about these creepy conventions he goes constume! And the video games, last month I learned ...
Student: Heads up!
(A book sails out of nowhere and hits Ron in the head.)
Ron: Ow!
Kim: ...everything I ever wanted to know about that stupid Fortress game.
Ron: Fortress?! The other night I spent six hours battling the hilltop fortress with nothing but a joystick and a will that could not be denied,
Kim: And to think that's time you might have otherwise wasted.
( Wade walks up.)
Wade: Kim, Ron.
Ron: Hey Wade.
(Kim and Ron do a double take, realizing that Wade is out of his room, which he has never done before.)
Kim and Ron: Wade?!
Ron: Live?
Kim: In person?
Ron: High Five!
(Ron attempts to high five Wade, but his hand passes right through Wade's hand.)
Ron: Ahh! Wade's a ghost! Wade's a ghost!
Wade: Ron! I am not a ghost.
Ron: Don't play me, specter.
Kim: Hologram, huh?
Wade: Precisely.
Ron: You almost fooled me. Almost.
Wade: The technology is incredible! You can literally be in two places at once.
(Wade's image begins to phase in and out.)
Wade: Eh! There are still a few bugs to work out.
(Wade's hologram disappears and his image reappears back on Kim's monitor screen in her locker.)
Wade: Any way, we got a hit on the site from a Lord Monty Fiske.
Kim: The archeologist?
Wade: How did you know?
Kim: I saw a documentary about him on the Knowing Channel.
Wade: He's discovered the location of a rare artifact. But he needs your help to get it.
( A piece of paper prints out and Kim pulls it out and looks over the details of the mission.)
Kim: Cool! So, who do we know who can give us a lift?
Ron: To Cambodia?

(Kim and Ron are on a military plane in Cambodia.)
Kim: Thanks so much for the lift, Colonel.
Colonel: Well after the way you tipped us off to that assault, Miss Possible, it's an honor and a privilege.
Ron: Anybody got gum?

(Ron and Kim are traveling on foot in the Cambodian Jungle.)
Ron: Nice place, KP! Come for the humidity, stay for the leeches.
Kim: (gasps when she sees something)
Ron: Huh?
Kim: A monkey temple!
Ron: M-m-m-m-m-m-monkey!
Kim: Oh no!
(Two men meet Kim and Ron just then. Ron is shaking with anxiety over monkeys)
Fiske: Kim Possible I presume? I'm Lord Monty Fiske. This is my valet, Bates.
Kim: This is my friend, Ron.
Bates: Your friend seems rather troubled.....> Fiske: Quite.
Kim: Um. Yeah.....Well,see it all goes back to Ron's first summer at Camp Wannaweep. He had to bunk with the camp mascot, Bobo the Chimp.
(The scene shifts to Summer Camp and Ron is stuck in a cabin with a chimp going crazy.)
Bobo: (screaming and yelling, breaking plates and tearing the place up. Ron is hiding in the corner in fear. )
(Kim snaps her fingers and Ron comes back to the present.)
Ron: Whoa! That was one crazy monkey!
Fiske: You do know of course chimpanzees are actually part of the ape family? They're not monkeys at all.
Ron: Monkeys! Apes! They all hold stuff with their feet, man! We're talking freaks of nature!
(Lord Fiske looks at Ron very sternly. Fiske and his butler go on ahead to the temple as Ron and Kim follow on their own.)
Kim: Ron! Could you get a grip?
Ron: Mark my words, Kim! His lordship is 500 miles of bad road.
Kim: Ron! Lord Monty Fiske is a world-famous explorer and highly respected scholar.
Ron: Bad road!
(They run into Lord Fiske and his butler waiting for them, having clearly overheard him.)
Ron: Oh! Ah, Monty, old chap...
Fiske: I believe I shall direct all further communication to Miss Possible, directly.
( Lord Fiske goes off to one side and shows a parchment ot Kim.)
Fiske: According to this map, the jade statue is here.
Ron: (still nearby) What's the statue of?
Fiske: A monkey.
(Ron shudders)
Kim: What's that?
Fiske: The locals believe that placing this icon in precise alignment with three others would generate a mystical monkey power. Utter nonsense, of course.
(Kim starts to go inside the temple to look for the statue, Ron hangs back.)
Kim: Come on!
Ron: Maybe there's a back way in?
Kim: Honestly Ron. There is nothing to be afraid of.
(Kim suddenly falls through a trap door in the floor of the temple.)
Kim: Wha!
Ron: Kim!
(Kim falls through a long shaft yelling. She lands in a stone chamber with three giant monkey heads on the walls moving their jaws.)
Kim: Whoaaaa! Oof! Ooo-kay. At least the walls aren't ...
(The walls start to close in on her.)
Kim: ......moving?
(Kim climbs and scrambles out of the chamber as the walls close in. She barely gets out before they completely close up, and she is back on the main floor.)
Kim: I feel so welcome here. Gotta find that jade monkey and get out.
(She walks down a corridor and monkey heads in the walls attack with flames.)
Kim: Whoa!
(Kim gets through the gauntlet of traps.)
Kim: Once again cheerleading saved my life.
(Kim walks up stairs toward monkey sounds. She slips over th edge and hangs by one hand. Looking down she sees the Jade statue amongst spikes.)
Kim: Spikes. Gee, where are the snakes?
(The snakes then appear.)
Kim: I was just being sarcastic!

( The snakes snap at Kim and she falls yelling into the pit. She manages to snag a spike with her ponytail band and lower herself to the ground near the statue. She walks over to it.)
Kim: The jade monkey.....
(Kim picks up the statue and then the spikes start to disappear into the floor. )
Kim: Whoa!
(The floor then tilts and dumps Kim through a tunnel back to the temple entrance where Ron, Lord Fiske, and his butler are waiting.)
Ron: Kim!
Kim: Huh?
Ron: What happened?
Fiske: Kim Possible, I shall see to it that the National Museum celebrates your heroic efforts.
Kim: It was no big.

(Kim and Ron are in sleeping bags at Lord Fiske's camp.)
Ron: I'm telling you, Kim, he's bad road. I feel it.
Kim: He has a royal title.
Ron: Which you can buy on the Internet!
Kim: Go to sleep.
(Ron sees a figure moving in the trees.)
Ron: Huh?... (whispers)There's a monkey in camp. A live one.
Kim: You're obsessed! Sleep!
Ron: Getting closer.....The monkey!!
(Ron hides under the covers. The figure slipsinto Lord Fiske's tent and emerges with the Jade statue. Kim wakesup )
Ron: (relieved)Ah, it's just a hooded ninja.
Kim: He's got the statue!
(Kim and the ninja start fighting. She knocks the statue out of his hands.)
Kim: Ron, catch!
Ron: Don't worry, Kim, I've got the monkey........
(The ninja temporarily traps Kim under a collapsed tent and chases Ron.)
Ron: I got the monkey!!!....
( Kim catches up and fighter the ninja again with Ron between them. Some of her strikes come close to him.)
Ron: Hey!!
(The ninja grabs the statue and hits Kin with Roin, then gets away.)
Kim: Oh no! He's gone, and the statue's gone with him.
Fiske: (emerging from his tent) What's all this, then?
Kim: Someone stole the jade monkey.
Fiske: How shockingly awful!
Bates: Yes, awfully shocking, milord.
Fiske: Word of our discovery must have gotten out. Oh, rot! If only your bravery was not wasted.

(Back at the Possible house)
Mr. Dr. Possible: Morning, honey. How'd Cambodia go?
Kim: Mixed. The good part, I rescued a priceless icon from a ferociously snaky spiky pit. Less good, a ninja stole it.
Mr. Dr. Possible: Oh, isn't that just like those darn ninjas? Well, this ought to flip that frown upside down. Cousin Larry felt so bad about missing you for game night, Aunt June invited us all over for dinner Saturday!
(Kim suddenly spits out the orange juice she was drinking.)
Kim: Oh, I...*cough, cough*....I wouldn't want to impose.
Mr. Dr. Possible: Not at all! June says Larry never has friends over.
Jim: Maybe because he's the dweebiest guy on the planet?
Mr. Dr. Possible: Jim.....don't mock family.
Tim: Maybe he's not even of this world! Maybe he comes from some far-off planet of dweebs.
(Mr. Dr. Possible frowns at the boys.)
Mr. Dr. Possible: Take a lesson from your sister, boys. Larry might not look like the coolest kid around, but Kim knows that you can't judge a book by its cover. Right, honey?
Kim: Huh? Hmmmmmmm.....

(Bueno Nacho)
Kim: Saturday is going to be night of the living Larry.
Ron: (Eating noisily) You know, I gotta tell ya! This Larry.... He sounds like a majorly fun guy.
Rufus: Majorly fun.
Kim: Want me to send him to your house?
(The Kimmunicator beeps)
Kim: Go, Wade.
Wade: Kim, I dug up some info on that jade monkey.
Ron: (covering his ears) La, la, la, la no monkey stuff! Get it no monkey stuff! La, la, la.
(Kim shuts him up by putting her hand over his mouth.)
Kim: Please continue, Wade.
Wade: The temple was one of four built by the followers of monkey kung fu. Each temple had a jade monkey.
Kim: Back up. What is monkey kung fu?
Ron: Other than sick and wrong?
Wade: According to legend, when the four jade monkeys were brought together, they gave the warriors mystical monkey power.
Kim: It's the same drawing we saw at the dig. But why separate the monkeys?
Ron: Because mystical monkey power is sick and wrong!
Wade: Actually, the legend says that the warriors didn't want anybody else to get the power.
Kim: Maybe the thief believed the legend.......

(Lord Fiske's castle in England)
Fiske: Bates! Bates!
Bates: Coming, milord. You know milord. I do wonder if it might have been a mistake to call in Kim Possible?
Fiske: Nonsense, the plan worked perfectly. She retrieved the item, didn't she?
Bates: Milord could have handled those primitive booby-traps.
(Bates trips while carrying a tea set. Fiske catches all of the set in midair with his hands and feet.)
Fiske: And risk injuring, these hands?!....
(Fiske pours himself some tea with his foot.)
Fiske: Besides, by masquerading as the ninja I throw suspicion off me.
Bates: You know best, of course milord.
Fiske: And now destiny awaits. For at last, I have all four monkeys. Ah ha! Ah ha! Ah ha-ha-ha-ha!
(Fiske and Bates go down a secret tunnel to a chamber deep in the castle. The four jade monkeys are there.)
Bates: Stunning in its monkeyosity.
Fiske: It is magnificent. And now, mystical monkey power shall be mine!
Bates: You mean that figuratively of course, milord?
Fiske: What's that, Bates?
Bates: Well, to truly believe that old myth would be crazy, eh?
Fiske: Crazy, you say? Like it was crazy to spend the family fortune on radical genetic mutation, and dangerous experimental surgery? Like it was crazy to become a man-monkey, who violates every law of nature and science?!!!!!........... It's a touch unconventional..........Now, put the magic monkey in place!

(Bueno Nacho)
Wade: The leading expert on all things simian is Lord Monty Fiske.
Kim: We helped him, he'll help us. We'll go talk to him this weekend.
Ron: Oh, that'll be a fun conversation! Monkey this, monkey that, monkey, monkey, monkey!
Kim: Ron, look ... Oh! Saturday, just remembered my dinner with Larry.
Wade: Can't you flake?
Kim: No, all flaking options denied.
(A figure appears at Kim's and Ron's table.)
Holo-Kim: Can I make a suggestion? Send me!
(Kim get up and looks the hologram over.)
Ron: Oh no, which one's the real Kim?
Kim: What do you think? ( putting her hand though the hologram)
Ron: Oh, sure! Make fun! But when holographic duplicates start running around, you can't be too careful.
Wade: Think about it, Kim..... My holographic simulator is ready for a field test.
Holo-Kim: Really, Larry? That's very interesting, Larry. Nice costume, Larry.
Kim: It rocks, Wade, but I can't do the virtual flake. I promised Dad. It is verrrrry tempting though.

(Ron and Kim are at Lord Fiske's castle)
Ron: So what made you decide to do the virtual flake after all?
Kim: Wade really wanted to test out the Holo-Kim.
(At the front door, Kim waits and looks at Ron.)
Ron: Are we gonna ring the doorbell? Knock? Something?
Kim: Uh, yeah....doorbell.
(Kim moves aside and indicates that Ron should do it. He rings the doorbell. Bates answers.)
Bates: (Gasps)Kim Possible?!
Kim: Nice to see you again, Bates. We just have a few questions for Lord Monty Fiske.
Bates: I shall announce your presence.

(Cousin Larry's bedroom.)
Larry: (in cheesy accent) Greetings Kim, I am Olthar. Maybe you recognize me from Return to Ios. Kim: Hello, Larry.
Larry: I do not know this Larry of whom you speak. I am Olthar. (normal voice) You really don't get the spirit of role playing, do you, cousin? As you can see, my Ios collection has grown quite impressively since your last visit. Notice anything amiss?
Kim: Uh-Uhhhh.
Larry: Ah, it's a Bernalus Senator with a silver cape. Huh, rather dramatic error on the part of the manufacture, given that the Senators wore only purple.
Kim: Really Larry. Isn't that fascinating.
Larry: Can I interest you in a game of Fortress? I can cheat code us right to level nine.

(Lord Fiske's castle. The corridors are filled with monkey tapestries and items which bother Ron.)
Ron: Monkeys.......... Wait up!
Fiske: Kim Possible..... and your monkey-phobic friend. How delightful.
Kim: Sorry to bother you, Lord Fiske. But we wanted to ask you some questions about.......
Fiske: So! You know all about it! About my obsession with Tai Shing Pek Kwar.
Ron: ...........Say again?
Fiske: Oh, we're playing stupid, I see. Tai Shing Pek Kwar! Monkey kung fu! Gah!
(Fiske abruptly leaves through the tunnel he just uncovered, leading to the room with the Jade Monkeys.)
Ron: Is it just me, or is he walking funny?
(Ron and Kim follow.)
Fiske: Grrrrrr! But did you know that I spent the family fortune to get these?!!!
Ron: (gasps)
Fiske: And these?!
Ron: Ohh! Bad road, bad road, bad road!
(Fiske stands in the circle between the Jade Monkeys and gets hit with their power.)
Fiske: (Idols glow) Ah ha ha ha ha! Bow to my power! I am Monkey Fist!!!
Rufus: Bye-bye.

(The Jade Monkey room at Lord Fiske's castle.)
Fiske: So, now you know my secret, which you will take to your graves.
Ron: How can you be so sure? I mean a lot can happen in the next sixty or seventy years......
(Fiske stares at him menaceingly.)
Ron: Oh, gotcha.
(Kim assumes a stance and Monkey Fist attacks, going right through her.)
Fiske: She is good!
Ron: You're the Holo-Kim!
Fiske: What?! Then where is the real Kim Possible?

(Cousin Larry's bedroom)
Kim: Hmmm....
Larry: Is that real-time streaming video?
Kim: Yeah, a Knowing Channel documentary. I'm sure you wouldn't be interested.
Larry: Au contraire. Long have I followed the career of Lord Monty Fiske. A little-known fact. He is a master of Tai Shing Pek Kwar.
Kim: What?
Larry: Monkey kung fu?
Kim: Monkey kung fu? (gasps) He was the ninja!
Larry: (looks at the Kimmunicator) Oh, can you play games with this?
Kim: Ron was right! He is bad road!
Larry: Hello, away team, do you read me?
Kim: Give me that!

Monkey Fist: And so, monkey hater! We meet again..... (Chime)
Monkey Fist: Serenity chimes, time to center.
(Monkey Fist enters meditation mode.)
Bates: Monkey kung fu is half mental.
Ron: Completely mental in this case!
(Chimes again. Ron knocks Bates down as he escapes up the tunnel.)
Bates: Oooff!
Monkey Fist: Now then. Where were we?
Bates: He's escaped, milord!
Monkey Fist: After him!

(Cousin Larry's bedroom.)
Kim: Wade, Lord Monty Fiske stole that icon! I think he believes in mystical monkey power.
Wade: It's worse. He has the power! And now he calls himself Monkey Fist!
Kim: And you know that how?
Wade: Ron's in his house right now.
Kim: Why did he go there alone?
Wade: He didn't, exactly........ You're with him.....sort of.
Kim: The Holo-Kim??...

(Lord Fiske's Castle. Ron is running through corridors with the Holo-Kim, chased by Monkey Fist.)
Kim: Ron!
Ron: Kim! Tell me you're real!
Kim: I wish. Wade got carried away with his new gimmick.
(End of a hallway.)
Ron: Dead end! Oh man!
Kim: There's a window.
Ron: Gimme a boost.
Kim: Uh, Ron.....I'm not really here, you know.
Ron: Right!
(Ron pulls on a candlestick which reveals a tunnel and upward staircase.)
Ron: Huh? This'll work.
(Ron reaches an upper floor and runs, but meets Monkey Fist.)
Monkey Fist: You can't leave now.
(Ron tries to run, but Monkey Fist lands in front of him.)
Monkey Fist: (whispers)...... Monkey.
Ron: Ahhhh!

(Cousin Larry's bedroom.)
Kim: I don't know what to do. If I were there, I could help him, but.......
Larry: Give it to me. I have an idea.
Kim: This isn't one of your stupid science fiction games, Larry! Ron's facing a kung fu mutant with bioengineered hands and mystical monkey powers and............Here......

(Lord Fiske's castle: A new hologram appears with Ron in place of Kim.)
Ron: Huh? Who are you?
Larry: Kim's cousin Larry, but that's not important.
Monkey Fist: I will no longer be distracted by holograms! Prepare for pain......
Larry: Remember level nine of Fortress? To defeat the Cloud Guardian, you must drink from his enchanted well.

(Cousin Larry's bedroom)
Kim: That's supposed to help?
Larry: It's a geek thing.

(Lord Fiske's castle. Ron escapes Monkey Fist's attack and runs own to the Jade Monkey room)
Ron's Voice: I must become that which I fear most!
(He runs into the circle and invokes the Jade Monkeys.)
Ron: Hey, monkeys! Hit me!
( The idols glow and hit Ron with the power.)
Ron: Oh yeah! I'm feelin' it!
Rufus: Woo!
(Monkey Fist comes in.)
Monkey Fist: No! Mystical monkey power is reserved for me and me alone!
( Ron is set down by the power.)
Ron: I must disagree. Oo-oo-oo wha wha!
(Ron and Monkey Fist do battle. Rufus fights Bates.)
Bates: Away with you, vile rodent!
Rufus: Ha!
(Rufus bites Bates in the foot.)
Bates: Oh! Ah! Oof!
(Rufus kicks Bates in the knee and knocks him down, then bites him.)
Bates: Ah..... Ow! Pain.
(Ron and Monkey Fist continue to battle. )
Monkey Fist: Mystical power or not, you have no chance against a master of monkey kung fu!
Ron: That's why I'm pullin' the plug. Rufus! Search and destroy!
(Rufus goes to destroy the idols. As he pushes them of their pedestals, Monkey Fist follows to save them.)
Monkey Fist: No! You'll ruin everything! That's quite enough. Stop it this very instant! I insist!
(Rufus pushed the idols all off, but Monkey Fist saved them.)
Monkey Fist: Ah ha! Ah ha! I -- I saved them all! Mystical monkey power will still be mine!!
Ron: Monkey this, you hairy freak!
(Ron does a flying side kick and slams into Monkey Fist. Scattering the idols and breaking them when they crash to the floor. Monkey is among them out cold.)
Monkey Fist: (Groans)
(Sirens sound as police raid the castle.)

(Cousin Larry's bedroom.)
Larry: And the rebellion on Bernalus was given such a passing mention in the film, I wrote my own story about the battle. You can imagine the debates that raged when I posted it on the fan site, Kim.
Kim: Really?
Larry: I'm not boring you, am I?
Ron: No, no, no, no! Go on, please! This is fascinating stuff.
Larry: Hey, you wanna see outtakes from Moon Beyond Ios?
Ron: The deleted footage of the shrieker race?
Larry: Got it at the '99 Tulsa Convention.
Ron: Score!
Kim: You guys are the greatest! When the chips were down, you both came through. I'm really proud.
Ron: So you gonna watch with us?
Kim: Not even a chance! Later, guys.
Ron: What, this is cool stuff, Kim!.....Kim?